by Erick GarciaYou are in the mood to socialize with and talk to a friend of yours, but what you want to talk about with this friend is simply too important to put into a text message. So instead of messaging them, you decide to call them. You call, the phone just keeps on ringing, and ultimately, your friend doesn’t answer. But right as the phone stops ringing, your friend texts you right back and says, “Hey! What’s up?” Maybe you’re thinking to yourself that your friend just missed your call and you think nothing of it. But then what if every time you called to talk to him or her, you get the exact same result and instead of picking up, he or she just ignores the call and instead texts you back? I’d like to think your immediate response would be, “Why won’t he or she talk to me?” The answer to this question is that some people find the act of verbal communication over the phone a strange, tedious, and overall irritating experience! However, I’d like to offer some insight as to why it’s important to give phone calls a little more consideration. When I asked people why they didn’t like talking over the phone, they have told me it’s usually because they find the experience to be an awkward one and because they don’t feel as if there’s anything to say. Additionally, they find the lack of facial cues and body language disturbing. They see phone calls as “rude.” While I can say I respect those reasons for not wanting to accept a phone call, I’d like to counteract some of these arguments most people nowadays make for not accepting phone calls. First of all, what is there to be afraid of? I can certainly understand if someone says that a phone call is an awkward experience when talking to someone he or she doesn’t know, but if it’s a friend calling, what is there to be weirded-out by? This person is someone that you know well enough to feel comfortable talking with, so why be afraid to talk to them over the phone? This brings me to my second counterargument: the lack of facial cues and body language. Sure, not being able to see the person you’re talking with in front of you can be a bit strange, but here’s the thing: you can still hear the other person’s voice! The human voice is made to express emotions such as happiness, shock, surprise, disgust, anger, and so on! Even if you can’t see who you’re talking to face to face, you’re still getting a sense of how they are reacting to what you’re saying, and this in turn should make it easier to keep the conversation going, because you are talking to them as if they were right there in front of you! As for the argument that phone calls are rude, I’d like to disagree: a phone call nowadays is possibly even more personal than a text message. The reason I personally think that a phone call is more personal is because a phone call now is a rare occurrence, especially if it’s a call from friends or family. Some people say it’s rude to get a phone call because it’s like the caller is saying “I’m more important than anything you’re doing right now.” I say that getting a phone call from someone is their way of telling me that even though they have a lot going on, they are going out of their way to talk to me and are expressing a desire to hear my voice. They don’t have to call me to talk to me, but they want to, and therefore, they want to establish a human connection with me instead of sticking to the technological norm that is texting. For a while I wondered if I was alone in holding these views in defense of phone calls. But then my best friend Lisa, and I had a conversation about precisely this. To my surprise, I found that she felt the same way I did about phone calls, particularly because she has fallen victim to the very scenario described in the beginning of this article. Every once in a while she would call a friend to talk to them, only to be ignored and instead receive a text from her friend not even a minute after she had called. When I asked for her honest opinion on phone calls, she told me that talking over the phone is important because she believes that a lot of the connection and emotion we have with people gets lost in translation through texting. While she agrees with me that being able to see someone’s facial cues and body language during a conversation is great, she also agrees with me that talking over the phone is the next best thing because the emotion in the other person’s voice compensates for the lack of their physical presence. Therefore, the human aspect of communication is still being preserved! Lisa believes that even though the use of emojis and texts are fun, they will never be the same as talking over the phone. Additionally, Lisa pointed out something that I hadn’t thought about before, and that is that a lot of arguments and misunderstandings could be avoided if people just called each other instead. This certainly got me thinking, and I’m sure now you are too! Maybe this article won’t be enough to sway your opinion on phone calls, but at least I hope I inspired you to think twice the next time someone calls you, especially if that someone is someone near and dear. Take a risk, answer the call, and above all, remember that wherever the conversation goes is up to you!
2 Comments
Ham n' cheese
1/30/2017 04:01:57 pm
Generally I feel trapped when folks call me. A person will call to tell me a few choice things that could easily have been texted and I'm left walking around my room in circles for hours trying to think of a polite way to get off the phone and get back to what I'm doing. It's not that I don't understand the importance of hearing the voice of people you care about but in a world where we see our friends tweets, instagram pics, YouTube vids, Tumblr posts, and see them in person is it really necessary to call them? How much exposure to our friends is too much? If I just looked at my friends instagram story about going to the aquarium do I really need to sit down and listen to them talk about how great the aquarium was on the phone? In a world where we aren't constantly bombarded by our friend's interests maybe catching up on the phone is necessary but if I'm going to see you in the next few days don't call me. Save the conversation so we don't both end up staring at our phones in silence when we see each other.
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Babee
2/18/2017 04:50:49 pm
I honestly think you made a valid case. I can relate to this article because I tend to call people less myself. The only people I can really call is my family rather than friends. Sometimes, I have pauses in phone conversations with my husband because I run out of things to say when we talk on the phone everyday. But texting is more convenient and will usually get an immediate response. There are good things in both texting and phone calls, but phone calls are definitely a beneficial way to communicate with grandparents for example lol
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